Southern Zombie: The bloggings of Ryan Rivers

Raleigh Sewer Monster beneath Cameron Village

2009-07-03T18:10:00.000-07:00

It has come to my attention that an unidentified blob of pulsating goo has been discovered in the sewers of Raleigh, North Carolina, underneath Cameron Village. The YouTube video contains footage of the organism shot in April of 08', and has gone viral on the internet.

Some are speculating that it is a congregation of tubifex worms, which I personally find unlikely, especially since the mass is pulsating in unison. There is another explanation which I find more probable, however. That would be a colony of bryozoan which are known to form clusters and usually dwell in dark wet habitats.

(A colony of bryozoan)

Individually these invertabrates are very small in size and have tube-like bodies, and tentacles. Got a better explanation for the sewer monster? Let me and the rest of the world know by leaving a comment below.

The Journey from the Lake to the Pan

2009-04-26T08:45:00.000-07:00

It's a beautiful day in April, nice and warm but still with a breeze, which means it's another great day to be fishing; this time on Lake Macintosh.

Arriving at the lake's boat area at just after 10:00 AM with my younger brother, and my father, we picked one of the four john boats that were left and began to put our things in order. We were armed with a bucket full of worms and night crawlers, some of which were collected the week before by us, and some which were purchased at the lake's marina upon arrival. After the Haw River experience I was fully expecting for live bait to be the ticket to fishing success, but we were also packing a small assortment of lures and jigs, just in case.

The goal today was to catch enough decently sized fish to have a fish fry, with all of the assorted fixings that go with it, and it had been a while. After our small green-colored boat had been equipped with a propeller (try rowing a couple miles and back), two batteries, plus all of the necessary fishing equipment we shoved off into the warm murky water. One of our batteries would get us to our fishing destination, the other would help get us back.

(The dock area over-viewing the lake)

The temperature was pleasant and the breeze was steady as we motored to our first location; the rock covered bank in front of a small cove.

(A rock covered bank on Lake Macintosh)

We began to cast our lines with worms and sinkers into the water and waited as we drifted slowly down the bank without an anchor. Nothing much happened except for a large northern water snake swimming in front of the boat. I was going to attempt netting him but he dipped under the water and disappeared.

It didn't take long for us to realize that nothing was happening in this particular location, not to mention there were a couple of other boats in or near the same cove. We decided to move to a location where we had luck in the past, so we began on our way to the more remote location, casting in an occasional worm-baited line along the way with no success.

As we continued, we began to see a familiar site; the dam.

(A distant view of the dam)

We had packed some water bottles and some boiled peanuts, so beginning with my brother we began to take advantage of the journey between locations and enjoy a cold drink. Then after what seemed like 30-45 minutes, we reached our destination.

It was a small, seclusive cove that had yielded us some nice bluegill in the past.

(A good bluegill cove on Lake Macintosh)

By now it was pretty obvious that live bait was not working, despite my initial beliefs. So with lures in hand, and a renewed sense of purpose we began to cast our rooster tails and jigs into the lake. It wasn't long before the first catch of the day came along.

(A White Bass, the first catch of the day)

A white bass lunged onto my lure aggressively and fought me all the way until I got him in the boat. If one is biting, then there are bound to be more. We continued doing this and I managed to pull in more white bass, one after the other, as it was becoming more and more likely that there would be enough for a fish fry. I should also mention that white bass is the state fish of Oklahoma.

(Another white bass caught on my orange rooster tail)

The white bass kept biting and we kept pulling them in, sometimes at the same time. The fish stringer was filling up quickly. My brother managed to catch a largemouth bass, but had to release it due to it not meeting the legally required 14 inches in length for largemouth. He also managed to catch a perch and two bluegill, one of which was released.

Despite the variety that he was catching, I was exclusively catching white bass, which was making me think that maybe there is something about my lure that was particularly appealing to them.

(Another of many white bass caught)

Some of the fish vigorously hit my line making me think that they were bigger than they actually were. As we crept along the shoreline, jigging and reeling, we bottomed out into a wide open area with a grassy bank. After spending some time here, and having a motor boat send waves disturbing our fishing, we began to head back in the direction of the marina. Besides, with 14 fish there was plenty for a fish fry.

Heading back in the general direction of the marina I spotted a duck wading in the water and decided to test how close I could get with the camera before he flew away.

(A duck wading in front of us, all the while keeping his eye on us)

We got ever closer and he was watching us closely, but I managed to get an even closer one before he finally got spooked and took off.

(A wading duck, just before flying away)

After the 30-45 minute cruise back to the marina, we unloaded our small boat piece by piece and loaded up the car for the drive home. At this time we were exhausted, a little bit grimy, and maybe a touch sunburned but we still had a big job ahead. Cleaning our catch.

Cleaning and scaling fish is not the most fun nor the most pleasant part of a fish fry, but the final product is more than worth it.

(The cleaning board, from left to right: white bass, bluegill, perch)

This photo represents the variety of fish that would need to be cleaned, but out of the total 14 fish that were kept, 12 of those were white bass.

I have spared you the gory details of removing the heads, the entrails, and the scales. Doing it once was enough, I don't need to re-live it. After the fish are cleaned, they go into a bowl of icy water for a number of minutes.

(A bowl of cleaned fish soaking in ice water)

The main point of this was to give us time to take a shower, wash our hands, and take a breath. After that, the fish will be covered in seasoned flour before hitting the fryer.

(The pan of floured fish, before hitting the fryer)

While the fixings and side dishes are being prepared, the floured fish go into the cast-iron skillet over the open flame of the grill stove to be fried in lard.

(A pan full of freshly caught fish frying in lard on the grill stove)

The smell of these freshly caught fish frying outside on a grill stove is indescribable! Before long, everything is ready and when it all comes together you get the final product; the fruits of your labor.

(My dinner plate: fish, french fries, hushpuppies and a side of slaw)

There you have it! I've shown you the journey from the lake, to the frying pan, and finally to the dinner plate. The fishing part is fun, the cleaning part isn't so much, but I am here to tell you that it is well worth it!

Cosmo my new Black Racer

2009-04-22T12:31:00.000-07:00

(Black Racer snake, or coluber constrictor)

As luck would have it, several days after catching the baby northern water snake at the river, I was searching in the leaf-covered woodlands behind my house and discovered a medium sized Black Racer, coiled up just underneath a thick tree. I slowly approached him as he began to slither away and I ended up chasing him almost into the neighbors yard and stopped when he went under a log in front of me.

I thought that it was over, that he had made it into a burrow or hole but I stood motionless for a couple more minutes, listening and looking for any sign of him. I then noticed the log at my feet and slowly uncovered it, revealing roughly an inch or two of the snakes body. I carefully reached down and pulled him out slowly, until I could see his head.

I decided to name it Cosmo (yes like Cosmo Kramer, being a Seinfeld fan) and fixed up a new home for him.

(Cosmo resting in his new home)

I was actually quite surprised that he did not attempt to bite me when I caught him. Black Racers have a bit of a reputation for biting when being handled, although he did release his bad smelling musk on me, which is a typical self-defense mechanism. Ughh.

Another typical scare tactic used by black racers, and some other non-venomous snakes, is to flutter their tails against the leaves as to make a sound like a rattlesnake.

Black Racers are non-venomous and typically eat small rodents, lizards, frogs and sometimes other snakes. Despite the name coluber constrictor they do not constrict, but actually hold the prey down with their body to subdue it.

(A Cricket Frog resting on a leaf in a creek)

Cricket Frogs, like the one above which I found in the small creek behind my house, could be considered typical food for a Black Racer.

A day of fishing at the Haw River

2009-04-18T11:22:00.000-07:00

It's mid April and the weather is beginning to warm up here in NC, and for me and a handful of other people this means it's time to go fishing. Me and and my younger brother headed down to our local recognized body of water, the Haw River, for a day of fishing and exploration. So we packed up our pepper spray (very underrated, but useful at a public river), our fishing gear, and some snacks etc. and headed out.

(Our grassy pathway to the Haw River)

We made our way through the cut path with brush on either side, watching our step and checking out our surroundings until we arrived at our first fishing destination, the bridge.

(We call it the Haw River Bridge)

Once there we immediately noticed that the River was higher than it normally is due to the recent rains, but decided to cast our lines anyway. Both of us carefully climed down the rock face which stood between us and the bank, and began to cast our rods and jig our lures in hopes of getting some Bluegill, or maybe some Bass.

After 15 minutes or so had passed in the same location it was becoming apparent that lures were not going to serve us well in the higher waters and faster rapids. Not to mention there were some pretty gnarly sand bugs.

So after re-climbing the approximately 15 foot rock face again, we began in the opposite direction; we were headed toward the dam area of the River.

(The dam area)

I spotted a huge cluster of turtles resting on two large rocks sticking up out of the water. They seemed almost stranded, or sun-bathing.

(Water turtles getting some sun)

Passing the turtles and continuing on we made it to the dam area, and began to realize that in order to get to the spots that we wanted, we had to get in the shallow water (which was cold, by the way). We sludged through the shallow water all the while getting small rocks and pebbles stuck in our shoes, and all of a sudden I decided to stop. I spotted a medium sized Northern Water Snake resting on a cluster of wood and leaves overhanging the bank, and snapped the following photo.

(A Northern Water Snake, or Nerodia sipedon)

The Northern Water Snake, or Nerodia sipedon, is a common non-venomous snake that feeds on frogs, crayfish, fish, and any other critters it can stretch it's mouth around. I was going to attempt to catch this guy but he was too far down for me to reach, and judging from that look on his face I would have been bitten a few times too. But of course it wouldn't be the first time...

Then a few minutes later while walking around in a somewhat isolated shallow area, I spotted a baby one resting just under the surface of the water. I carefully reached in and grabbed him in such a way that he would not be able to bite me, and even if he did it wouldn't be much of a bother. I mean look at him, he's harmless!

(A baby Northern Water Snake)

And here is another one just for your viewing enjoyment. Also realize that I took the photos of the baby snake after taking him home, as I was so enthralled with him I didn't think to do it back at the river.

(Photo #2 of baby Northern Water Snake back at home)

I should also mention that unless you are absolutely sure of what you are doing, do not try to pick up any snake or attempt to catch it. I have been doing this off and on for years and I always make a point to know exactly what kind of snake it is before I even think about trying to catch it. North Carolina does not contain very many varieties of poisonous snake, but it always pays to be safe.

We continued to venture down the trail, stopping periodically at new openings to cast our lures but it just wasn't working. The water was too high, the fish didn't seem very hungry, and we didn't have any alternative bait...yet.

Then, after a while, we happened upon an area where the river was more calm, and decided to turn over some logs and rocks in search of crayfish. I managed to catch one, and I also managed to get two earthworms in the process. Then I had a great idea. I put one of the earthworms on the hook with my lure, sort of a lure/live bait hybrid kind of thing. At the next opening I cast it in, and positioned my rod on the ground thinking that I should just wait for a tug, when I noticed that it was already moving.

(A medium sized Bluegill, hooked on my lure/live bait hybrid rig)

I began to reel in my line when to my surprise I had a medium sized Bluegill fighting with me on the other end! Now secure in my knowledge that my contraption worked, I added my other worm and dropped it no more than 2 feet from the bank, wham!

(Another Bluegill, my brother snapped this one for me)

This guy was smaller, but still a fighter! It also meant the last of my two worms, thus putting an end to the short lived fishing success. We were both rather tired from hiking all day from location to location, and decided to call it quits. Although the day only yielded two Bluegill, it was still a success!

Oh, and next time the lures aren't working try strapping a worm on there and leaving it on the bottom. It can't hurt!

Ben the Friendly Ghost

2009-03-19T09:51:00.001-07:00

Ahhh... the first post of the year. What has happened since the last one you ask? My 21st birthday, a new president took office, and spring is in the air.

But that is not what my new post is about is it? Can't be..

(Look familiar?)

Recognize this picture? If you were a paranormal investigator maybe you would. It has been on a ghost hunting website for upwards of five years now, and do you want to know why? Well, mainly because of me. I took a picture of the beautiful forest surrounding my house and got the bright idea to somehow integrate my friend's face into the mist to give it the impression of a human face, and sent it in to be reviewed.

"Now why would you do something like that Ryan?" you may be asking. Quite simply I wanted to see just how seriously some of the "Ghost Evidence" sites take the authenticity of their content. And yet, it still stands, like a monument.

So next time you want to search the net for evidence of Ghosts etc, the only thing you may be seeing is Ben, the friendly ghost.

Hot Leg: An Epic New Band

2008-09-26T19:08:00.000-07:00

Sometime in 2003 I was watching Vh1, and I was introduced to the "I believe in a thing called love" music video by The Darkness and remember thinking how there was no way that it was a recent song. I mean, considering all the regurgitated grunge that was floating around, and the whiny new emo music that had been coming out.

Long story short I became a fan, unfortunately never getting a chance to see them live. After they disbanded in 2006, to most of their fans it seemed like Rock n' Roll had lost it's second wind.

However that is not the case. Former Darkness frontman Justin Hawkins has formed a new band entitled Hot Leg (yes, a singular leg) with Pete Rinaldi (Lead Guitar), Samuel SJ Stokes (Bass), and Darby Todd (Drums). Their first single, Trojan Guitar, contains a mix of vocal and guitar harmonies that are seldom heard from more recent acts.

The Indie Filmmakers Forums

2008-06-21T11:03:00.000-07:00

It has been a little while since I made a noteworthy post here, or any post for that matter. Mainly because I didn't think anyone was viewing this thing (wonder why). Anyways, a while back I started a forum for independent film makers to discuss various aspects of filmmaking in the 'indie market.'

The address for this board is independentfilm.proboards44.com

Yes, it is not very fancy..but It does serve the purpose of hosting intelligent (most of the time) discussions with other people in the same field. If you work in this field give it a look and take the time to register, or even start a discussion.

The Eternal Ramen Noodles - Part II

2008-02-26T12:10:00.002-08:00

As you know, I did an article on the ramen noodles that were thrown out many weeks ago with absolutely no signs of decay. I updated it with another picture taken exactly one week after the first, and there was still no decay. In fact, it was even worse, it was starting to turn purple.

I've taken a third photo, the ramen is now on it's 5th week of being on the ground.

(As you can see, the purple is starting to spread on this stuff. Man...that's weird)

(This is the last picture I'm going to take, on it's 6th week. It's decayed a tad, but I could very well be doing this for years until it totally fades away)

I'm starting to think that maybe it's slowly going to join back together into a little ramen monster and kill me in my sleep. Or attempt to take over the world, which is just as disturbing.

The Eternal Ramen Noodles

2008-02-09T14:43:00.000-08:00

Ok, this is going to be even more strange than the zombie experience, trust me. Almost three weeks ago now, lets say that some off-tasting ramen noodles (no, not top noodles) were thrown out near the front porch. Now usually, it isn't but a few hours later that a possum or something eats thrown out scraps, but no. Not this time. Infact, I don't think it would survive if it did, to be more frank.

You see, these ramen noodles have been sitting in the soil near the porch for over 3 WEEKS. Something is just wrong here, even the bacteria aren't touching it. Now I know that this stuff comes from China, but what the heck would they be putting in these noodles? It sure isn't flower and egg, my guess would be nylon, based on the sheen that it gets when the sun hits it just right. Maybe they have advanced to actually putting the 7 year olds in it instead of just forcing them to make it.

So, something this monumental deserves it's own article and that's exactly what it's going to get. I've taken a "Now" picure of the stuff sitting there in the soil, three weeks after being thrown out. Did I mention it has survived numerous rains and a snow? Here is the picture, just for the purpose of tracking it's decay. I'm going to see how long this stuff takes to fully dissipate.

(Behold, the all powerful ramen. Update pics to come)
(This is an update photo, taken one week after the first. Look
closely and you can see an almost purple tint to it, yuck)

I'm never touching another ramen again, 15 cents a pack or not. And to think, I practically lived off this stuff in the summer of 06', no wonder I had that strange headache.

The full story

2008-01-24T13:24:00.000-08:00

Well I have to be honest, I really did not know what to expect as I drove through downtown Mebane, looking at all the pale looking people walking down the sidewalk. I found a space to park a little ways down the street, near a bar. My brother (Jake) was with me, and our friend Chris, who were hoping to score a role as an extra in this zombie film we had heard about on the news.

I mean, we just had to do it. Around here in rural/backwoods North Carolina nothing really happens, so when you have the opportunity for something like this things get really exciting. So I went down to their little "office" and got the waver form (or whatever they call it) to sign the rights to my soul away for this little independent zombie film. Well, that's overstating it a little bit.

(Im not in this shot, but you can see the sign up desk)

It was getting about dusk, and so after picking which group of undeads we would be filming with, we headed to the makeup section down in the basement of an old bar. The line was sort of long, so people started making small talk of course. That's when I noticed this one guy, he had a really pale-ish eye. Not just pale, it was... like a zombie. I was thinking "Man, this guy really means business, he brought his own fake eyes and everything!"

Well, my brother starts talking to the guy, who also had his girlfriend (or atleast I think it was) with him. After a few minutes of chat, it turns out he had lost his eye in the Iraq war, and that was his replacement. And to think...I was about to ask where he got the cool prop!

After a long wait, we finally started getting close to the makeup people. As we got nearer to the door, we could hear the occasional bottle busting on the floor from the bar above. It was also starting to get really muggy, all those people and so little space. So finally, it comes my turn to be zombified, and I take a seat. The lady starts smearing white cream latex all over my face, on my eyelids, on my ears... everywhere that skin is showing. But I'm not done yet, I wait in another line to get the dark paint put under my eyes and a few final touches.

(Im not in this shot either, but you can see the makeup basement)

So I walk out of the bar basement looking like Alice Cooper, to rejoin Chris and my brother to wait on the director for directions. By now the small town streets are filled with people, zombies and non zombies, waiting on their instructions. Another few minutes goes by (seemed like forever) and a megaphone cuts through the crowd. Phoenix, the director, instructs us to find our groups and for each group to go to their positions and sit tight.

He then addressed one of the other groups, the biggest one, to get ready for their scene. Finally, some action. The truck that was carrying the camera equipment pulls out into the middle of the street, as the crew tries to get the perfect angle. Then it happened. Pheonix yelled "Action!" and a hord of drooling zombies sluggishly started rounding their way around the side of a town building, moaning and groaning. They eventually made their way up the street, closer and closer to the camera as they dragged their feet and clawed at the air.

He yelled "cut!" which ended the scene. For the next hour or so, it was just a matter of waiting, so we found a seat and sipped on some water that the crew had provided and just relaxed. Chris had decided for some reason that he didn't want to be an extra so he was sitting on the sidelines watching all the activity. We observed scene after scene, until it came around to our turn, and finally it did.

We had been provided with 4 tootsie rolls each at the sign up desk, and now that it was our scene we were told to chew these until the drool ran down the sides of our mouth. Our scene involved three of the main characters, armed with farm weapons (rakes and such) trying to defending against an encroaching circle of surrounding undeads. We took our positions and waited for the signal.

(That's me in the green muscle shirt, standing with the director)

Three or four takes later we had completed our first scene, and were looking forward to what was going to come next. We continued to shoot scenes on different corners of the street, but the plot was basically the same, time really flew by fast. We took another break, at which point everyone sort of wondered off. You could hear several different bands playing, at several different bars at the same time.

It was getting sort of late, near 11 pm, so Jake and Chris called in a ride home. Most people were starting to leave, because the shooting was expected to last until 3 am, but I intended to stay the entire thing out. Several more takes were done with us remaining zombies, approaching slowly behind the actress playing the sword wielding zombie killer, at which point I was stabbed and squirted with fake blood. I had been slain.

(The sword wielding zombie slayer, and me standing on the far right)

It was hard to believe, but the time was getting close to 3 am, so everyone was getting tired. Pheonix then walked out and announced that if you where still here as a zombie, you where now a featured zombie. I didn't really know what that meant, but at this point there were about 20 of us zombies left. Now I was a featured zombie (a tired one, but it was worth it) which meant that each of us got a close-up 15 second or so shot of our best zombie moaning and groaning while walking in place towards the camera.

The shoot came to an end, and I walked back to my Ford Escort to start my journey home after a long but exhilarating day of filming. I was especially carefull of the possible tanked driver, I had seen a good few of those leaving the bars and trying to drive themselves home, fortunately some of the crew members were able to persuade them not too.

Jake later told me that he had gotten a few strange looks after going into a nearby convenience store on one of our breaks...I would have liked to have seen the look on their faces.

A week, 10 showers, and 2 scrubbings later the latex makeup started to come off.

Introductions

2008-01-24T11:11:00.000-08:00

Having developed an interest in acting just recently, I was "lucky" enough to be cast as a featured Zombie in Southern Undead, an upcomming independent film set in Mebane NC with an anti-tobacco message. It is directed by Pheonix Mangus, and is being filmed by Hey Y'all productions. I can say with all honesty, that that was one of the funnest experiences of my life...I mean, who wouldn't want to be a zombie?

That was six months ago, in the near future (this coming fall) I plan on doing some work at the original Hollywood Horror show.

And yes..I will be putting up pictures.

This leads me to one of the reasons for this blog, I know that there has to be someone out there (other independant filmmakers) looking for good fake blood recipes etc.. So I'm going to dedicate a portion to the best information I can collect on the art of realistic theatrical blood all in one place, as opposed to surfing through ten pages of google results. They are going to be right here at your fingertips.

If you like, you can visit my myspace (trendy I know): http://www.myspace.com/ryanriversmusic

Or my YouTube channel, where I've uploaded some of my musical scores: http://www.youtube.com/ryanriversmusic